Feeds:Wait, I thought today had been Monday.... oh, that was this morning!
- Conveying: Late night
- The Saying: "Have you ever tried to balance Freid on your head?" -unknown, pd (I forgot, alright?)
- When Praying: That Ian gets everything straightened out
I forgot to mention in my post this morning that I'm giving up drinking. Not just for Lent, but for a good long while. Namely, until I turn twenty-one. I decided this for many reasons, but in large part because it was pointed out to me (by Amanda, who apparantly still loves me dearly and takes an interest in my affairs) that it is illegal for me to purchase and consume, on my own, alchohol at my current age. Though I am not morally opposed to drinking -in moderation, por supuesto- I am morally opposed to breaking the law. So. Lucky for me, Beth is also going to stop buying alcohol, so we'll both be sober together, which is fun indeed.
Dinesh got a turntable. I will retrieve my vinyls over spring break.
In the next week, I will be organizing my life. I know I'll have to make cutbacks. I know that I probably won't have time for ZZT, and that I definitely won't have time for chat. SOS, I think I'll take a break from anything major, and just help out at events. IVCF, I mean to go more. I'd like to try to get back into SCA. I'd like to be more involved in the Folklore Society. Euphony will probably stay as it is. I'd really like to get into the Hyde Park music scene a lot deeper; they're nice people. I'd also like to keep THIS, be it Smallhouse, CU, or something else, up, intact, and active. Who knows? All of that is secondary to the real work, the spiritual work, that takes first priority. But that's not so much anyone's business.
Speaking of business, I actually got flirted with at Fred's tonight. There's this girl, Sarah, who's a first year and has bright orange hair. On the days I work, she's always up until about the time I get off, so she buys something almost every night. Tonight, we talked/flirted/polished pennies for a while. I'm not sure what to make of it. She's pretty, to be sure, but she also smokes. Not sure how I feel about that.
Or am I? I know I don't want to smoke myself. Yesterday-ish I took a vow never to smoke again. Again meaning, of course, that both times I've gotten drunk, I've smoked. That's essentially the measure of how drunk I am; whether I'm willing/wanting to smoke. This is another reason I'm not going to drink for a while. I decided to make that vow partly to combat my fears that without it, I would start smoking. I don't have anything against people that smoke, but it's not something I want to do, because it's something I could see myself getting addicted to. I doubt I'd ever become an alcoholic; I don't like the stuff, or its effects, enough for that. Nor do I think I'd get hooked on gambling, since I've gambled a fair bit in my past and felt no need to keep playing against reason (ie, to attemp to win back money already lost, to take unwarranted risks, to gamble in order to win money, to gamble with money I don't have). In fact, I've typically avoided all of those nearly by habit. But smoking.... there's an undeniable appeal to holding something burning in one's mouth. Add to that my general disregard for my own well-being and my fondness of fire and smoke in general, and it's dangerous. The cap of the trouble is, of course, that I no longer find tobacco smoke inherantly unpleasant. If it were not for that, it wouldn't be an issue. Every time I would see a groupof smokers, I would feel a longing, and think back to Aaron's adamant warning against smoking, and how eventually you'll need it just to feel normal. It scares me.
Fortunately, I have several friends who are more than willing to slap cigarrettes out of my hand if they see me with one. Lucky me!
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