Smallhouse Log

Thufri
"Met someone at a dogshow; she was holding my left arm. Everyone was acting normal so I tried to look non-chalant." -'She's an Angel' by They Might Be Giants

Here's my case: I'm all for fighting the undead, except when it comes at the expense of swashbuckling. This is why Pirates of the Carribean is not, despite what the title may have you think, so very much a pirate movie, or at least not a good one. (A note: No movie with Johnny Depp is ever a bad movie, and I think it would be a decent movie even aside from his contribution, but not a good pirate movie. Dig?) This is so much the case that I think a title such as 'Revenge Epic and Voyage of Self-Discovery in the Carribean' might be more appropriate, if a bit cumbersome.

Now I grant you, The Pirates of Penzance is not so very much a pirate movie either, but far more so than the above title, even though it lacks a sea battle/ship boarding scene. For starters, there exist no overt elements of the supernatural. Secondly, the crew is more pirate than they are anything else, as opposed to the two crews in the other movie, one of which is more evil than anything else, and the other of which is more a collection of characters that are, frankly, a bit too colourful. Thirdly, a pirate movie is generally about either agents of order trying to vanquish troublesome pirates, or about greedy pirates trying to acquire treasure. The latter film fits in the former category; the former film insufficiently fits either. Fourthy, Pirates of the Carribean contains not nearly enough singing, even if one considers Pirates of Penzance to contain, as some do, too much. Pirates, by nature, are musical people. Everyone knows this. Fifthly, no CG. Sixthly, obviously fake parrot > monkey, in terms of pirate movie authenticity, anyway (not to be confused with actual pirate authenticity). And that's just six reasons why Pirates of Penzance is a better pirate movie than Pirates of the Carribean. When one considers other prime pirate movie elements, as can be observed in Roman Polanski's Pirates or Treasure Island (even, I may add, the Muppet version), such as wanton murder, being set adrift on a raft, or ships set blazingly on fire, not to mention such nearly essential occurances as a burial at sea, digging for treasure, and at least one really good backstabbing, all of which are absent from Pirates of the Carribean.... well, you get my point.

And that self-discovery thing was sooooo very much a Treasure Island rip-off, too.

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